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Category: My Life’s Like That

If There’s A Future, We (Have) It Now: The Return of Paramore, Live in KL 2013

There was no build-up of any suspense, no prolonged intro. Ethereal quiet “ooohs” came on, 4 drumstick beats followed, then BAM – Paramore launches head-long into the opening track, “Now”. The stadium went berserk. Paramore is f**king back.

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Personally, there were many reasons for me not to go to The Return of Paramore, Live in KL 2013. Firstly, I’m no longer young. My partial-OKU status, what with my destroyed spine disc, meant I was far from qualified for rock-zone-physicality. Even more, past experiences remind me that I no longer am fit to, for example, fly to Singapore, line up at 12pm, swallowed in hordes of teenage punks submerged in their iPhones, basking under sunshine & rain for a day while awaiting entry till 7pm, then standing, jumping, then getting compressed, violated, pushed & tumbled down by kiasu, over-enthusiastic rock-zone-mosh-pitter-wannabe-monkeys.

But there were reasons to go also. Yes, they are my utmost favourite band, that’s a given. The last time I saw them live was in Singapore in March 2010, & I missed their October 2010 show on our own soil because I was offshore. The bonus this time was that it was held in an indoor stadium, so environmental concerns are removed from the equation. The sound wouldn’t be bastardized too. I was helped by the fact that my favourite woman in the world loved me so much she bought us tickets for the seating zones where fat asses, not-so-loaded kids, free-loaders & OKUs are preferred. In addition, I needed to get out of this whole SNSD-crazed-syndrome, & who better to smack me back to my senses than Paramore?

Most importantly, we had to, for one night, unite & show Paramore that we are still here for them. We had to answer Paramore’s call in their latest single – “if there’s a future, we want it now”. To say the past 2 years have been troubled times for Paramore as a band would be an understatement. The looming vibe & anger that first surfaced & inspired their previous album’s works, Brand New Eyes, finally erupted into a full-blown fiasco that reached its peak when the Farro brothers, so integral to the essence of Paramore from the very beginning, left the band in an emotional fallout. But Hayley, Jeremy & Taylor soldiered on, & judging by the number of us who turned up on February 17th night at Stadium Negara, we are still here for Paramore, & we sure as hell want more.

Then of course, there’s that tiny little reason to rule them all – something that, well…rhymes with Bailey Billions?

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Let’s not kid ourselves here. Yes, Paramore is a band. But this confession is coming from the deepest freaking Parawhorish heart of mine – in Hayley Williams, they have the most awesome frontwoman of our generation, & it is her all-round talent, vocal prowess & charisma that sets the band apart.

Yup, that tiny little reason was more than enough to lead yours truly’s veteran ass into Stadium Negara, sitted amongst those kids.

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We’re ready!

Opening act mewithoutYou from Pennsylvania kick-started the show at just before 8. Okay, truth be told I didn’t really dig their kind of music style, what with all the sing-speaking-screaming vocals & all, but damn their band sound was pretty darn good. They did however seem to play on forever in what was a longer-than-expected set, which was fine, but my ass & lower back were starting to hurt. Then the heavens parted & God answered in the middle of mewithoutYou’s set when a speck of blazing orange-y red hair appeared from backstage to join in out of nowhere. Sweet Mother of God, it’s Hayley! Prancing around & joining in the singing, wrapped in an over-sized sweater & army pants, she could not have been any cuter. She disappeared backstage right after a song. What a tease.

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The band said their thank-yous & good-byes, the stage was cleared, lights were lighted-up, then dimmed. This is it.

There was no build up of any suspense, no prolonged intro. Ethereal quiet “ooohs” came on, 4 drumstick beats followed, then BAM – Paramore launches head-long into the opening track, “Now”. The stadium went berserk. Paramore is f**king back.

Paramore Performing Now Live Kuala Lumpur 2013 Hayley

So there I was in a rock concert, seated down for the very first time in my life. Hands raised, head-banging as much as I physically could to the stunning euphoria that has erupted on stage. The two girls in front of me however could no longer hold themselves. It wasn’t long before they lifted their butts off their seats & started jumping & gambolling wildly (but extremely awkwardly & unsightly too, I might add). Now, afew years earlier I would have not minded it & would probably even outjump them, but that was years ago. As they were blocking the views of myself & the people behind us, I politely tapped on the shoulder of the more-tomboyish-looking lesbian (sorry, I mean girl) & delicately gestured them to sit down. They were visibly surprised & shot me venomous looks that could only mean “Why the f**k are you all sitting down in a bloody Paramore concert.” I completely understood that. Years ago, I would have probably punched this current pathetic version of me in the balls.

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Apparently even Hayley agreed because, to much of my own amusement & embarrassment, just a song later she said out loud to the crowd: “I see all you beautiful people sitting comfortably at the back there. & we are all happy & good. But by the end of this if you guys are all still not standing up, then we’re gonna have some real trouble. Yes, it may hurt a little. You guys are going to be sore for a whole week, KL!” (something like that la, as far as I can recall & summarize)

To which tomboy-lesbian-girl perfectly-timed her retort to me: “Hear that, f**ker!”. Oh, to be young & energetic.

I, along with most of those around me still seemed too comfortable, but it became clear it was getting impossible to resist when Hayley hollered out a 2nd invitation to stand up, dance & finger-snap to “Fences”. Screw this, I’m gonna rock out. I spent the rest of the concert standing, head-banging, arms-flapping & jumping (well, okay, jumping is physically a little too far-fetched) like a retarded teenage punk. Yes, for an hour or so, I almost forgot about my back.

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I do not know exactly how many songs they sang, probably about 16-18 songs or so. But it was clear Paramore meant (misery!) business, & they were bloody damn in their element. Outstanding moments? Too many. That fiery “Oh, Father” outro at the end of “Let The Flames Begin” that had Hayley singing lying down. The massive singalong during “The Only Exception”, also one of my most cherished memories from their Singapore concert 3 years ago. The epic crowd atmosphere that accompanied “Brick by Boring Brick”, & of course, the closing number, “Misery Business”. The customary Jeremy+Taylor back-flip during “Pressure”. & I absolutely loved the fact that they performed all 4 songs from their last Singles Club album – “Renegade”, “Hello Cold World”, “In The Mourning” & “Monster” – which were all always underrated, brilliant songs. I also loved how “In The Mourning” was delivered acoustically with just Taylor on the guitar accompanying Hayley, as how this song started & was always meant to be compared to the over-produced album version.

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I have to say the Farro brothers probably weren’t missed, but Zac’s drumming was probably more impactful. That being said, former Nine Inch Nails & Angels & Airwaves drummer Ilan Rubin did a commendable job on this tour, & I believe he is also the stand-in drummer for the coming album as well. As all good concerts are, by the time the last chorus of “Misery Business” ended (led by invited-onstage-fan Lucy), it all felt too short, but we were left absolutely satisfied. Sure, I would have liked it if they sung their old gems like “My Heart”, “When It Rains”, & “Emergency”. But who am I to complain, when all I feel is an out-pour of gratitude to Paramore for coming back again.

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As we walked out of the stadium, I asked my better half of what she thought of Paramore’s awesomeness live, to which she uttered “They really sound exactly the same live & recorded.”

Look, my dearest of all, I love you with all my heart & soul, but this is where you are very very wrong – Paramore, spearheaded by the explosively spectacular Hayley Williams, are one of those rare ones that actually sound better live. They just really need to be experienced live.

With this, thank you thank you thank you thank you Paramore for coming back. & thank you to the tomboy-lesbian-girl too, for inspiring this broken veteran to physical lengths he had no idea he could still reach.

& with that in mind, I think I’m good for 2013. No more concerts, I’m all good.

Unless SNSD decides to drop by of course.

All pictures published are credited to http://entertainment.malaysia.msn.com & http://www.room8five.com, since I didn’t even bother to smuggle in a camera this time.

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The Journey Into The Ears

This is a tale about how I got my in-ears.

When these started to feel old & insufficient

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I wanted to have a new pair of these

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Because I was heavily influenced by the national treasure of Korea

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Then I got distracted by these

Monster Turbine High-Performance In-Ear Speakers

& also liked these after testing

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In the end I went to the audio headphones store to get these

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But ended up with a pair of these!

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Simply because, for an entry-level in-ears for daily commute heavy usage, coming from a manufacturer of such repute, I have yet to find a pair that is as impressive. value-for-money & feels as properly-built as these.

Nobody’s Home

2 days ago…

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Yesterday…

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Tonight…

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My own actual room is becoming a weekend getaway 🙂

Every Boy Needs A Toy: Part V

& this time it took a little more out of his piggy-bank tabung.

But then, he looks up & sees twinkling twinkling little stars across the night sky through the outrageously beautiful moonroof…

(or the occasional “perfectly-baked” bird droppings during the day)

Then there’s that tantalizing tiny whissshh from the waste gate of the turbocharged heart…

(along with the drinking rate of this fuel-aholic)

Well, unfortunately she ain’t this, but it’s close enough for me. 😀

I’ve gone French & I love it!

– Milestone #1, Wife #3 –

Every Boy Needs A(nother) Toy: Part IV – & Every Boy Wants A Freaking Lambo!

What does this author/wanker & Bruce Wayne have in common?

He’s gonna be driving the gorgeous new Aventador in next year’s The Dark Knight Rises.

Mr. Wayne’s will come in black, naturally.

& now I have one too!!!

Only mine happens to be the cheapest Lamborghini you can get your hands on. But it does come in the same glossy bold orange finishing! Kakakakaka.

Still, it’s every boy’s wish to own one of those outrageously exotic Italian rides, so let this be the first step towards…the continuance of dreaming about my dream. 😀

12. inches owned, a couple of meters more to go!

Orange, yellow, red…am I having some kind of personal crisis I’m not aware of?

Read Part I, Part II, or Part III.

What Ringtones Say About Your Ass (Accompanied By Angels)

It’s 3pm, 7 hours on the dot since the meeting kicked off, with no end in sight. Tensions are high as a group of important-looking asses are engaged in a heated, endless, suffocating debate that consists of many jargons that you don’t really need to know about except that a lot of ka-ching is involved. Someone breaks a sweat. Someone else shifts his colossal ass uncomfortably. On one end a lanky bloke gulps down a bottle of Evian water to quench a little of his exhausted throat thirst, getting ready to launch another tirade against the other belly-overload guy on the other end of the table, most eager to tell him that everything about him is wrong. The belly-overload guy stares back at him, ready to receive & fire back an onslaught of rebuffs, also secretly sniggering underneath because he’s been screwing that lanky bloke’s vivacious wife for years now & the lanky bloke has no idea. But I digress. In short, it’s a typical shitty meeting of a bunch of important-looking people.

Then, someone’s cellphone starts ringing. Oops, he forgets to silent his phone, so the whole room hears a hilarious Russell Peters shout “Be A Man!”, then switching to “Somebody gonna get hurt real bad tonight” blaring out of those miserable iPhone 4 ass speakers. Bam! Tension’s gone. Everyone snorts. “Shit that ringtone’s funny. This dude’s wacked awesome!”, you’d think.

Same situation, instead this time it starts with the “Everyday I’m shuffling” of LMFAO’s “Party Rock Anthem”. Immediately this goes into your mind – “Oh, pretty cool song. Probably would bump into him in Zouk on Fridays.”

Imagine the same situation again. Now you hear a baby giggling uncontrollably. You go “awww…so cute.”

Last case scenario. Any song cut from that insufferable kid named Bieber. “*explitives* LOSER” flies straight through your mind. Right?

Suffice to say a ringtone, or any type of notification blaring from your phone inadvertently subjects you to some sort of judgement of your own personality by those unfortunate enough to have experienced the decibels. A quick browse through CLEO & online sources & here I’ve done a quick 5 minute summary (quoting from the sources & adding a lil of  my own words too) of the types of ringtones & what they say about oneself. So, which are you?

Oh yea, on a totally unrelated but still related topic, I’m just going to be posting images of Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show 2011’s backstage moments in random in this article. Simply because my mind keeps switching back to those leggy stunners, aren’t they much more interesting anyway?

Back to the list. Here goes!

1. Silent

You are probably the strong & silent type, in addition super-considerate above all else that your personal calls do not bother anyone. Which probably means you are a workaholic.

2. Default (a.k.a. those Nokia tones)

Either you are too busy for your own good, or this reveals your inability to keep up & master technology. Oi don’t know how to change ringtone kah?!

3. Animal Sounds

You’re a prankster who loves those dumbfounded looks on people when they hear the mating sounds of a group of horny monkeys. Or, you’re into bestiality.

4. Chart toppers

You see life as a popularity contest & yourself as a social butterfly. Popular jams have mass appeal & as much as you don’t admit or would like to pretend otherwise, you like to be liked.

5. Hip-Hop, R&B with some Obscenity Thrown In

You are those with some passive aggressive social issues who love putting on a swagger, often seen talking or tweeting about the week’s shenanigans. Boss probably won’t be able to take you seriously when Akon whines about “wanting to fark you” from time to time. You may also need counseling in your near future.

6. Heavy Rock or Pop

You’re on the nervous side, you like the big city, and you just hate feeling trapped. You tend to move quickly, but don’t always consider the consequences. You drive a sports car or a funky truck, and you drive it pretty fast.

7. Movie or TV Themes

You most likely do not have enough drama or challenges in your own life. Or you are running away from your own life.

8. Country, Soft Rock or Oldies

You’re a romantic—a nostalgic, with a keen sense of rhythm. You like to dance (or would like dancing if you’d ever bothered to learn). You would rather be a follower than a leader, and you are charitable.

9. Jazz

You are an explorer, both anxious to try new things but with a little patience thrown in.

10. Classical Music

You’re a genius with impeccable tastes! Or that’s what you’d like people to think. You aren’t fooling anyone into thinking that you’re a connoisseur of the finer things in life.

11. Custom-made ringtones

You have a unique personality, an entrepreneur of originality. You don’t follow the crowd, but dance to your own drummer. It is also highly likely you are mostly a swaggering egoistic leader with big balls.

12. Themes from either Sesame Street, Star Wars or ICQ

You think you are all retro, vintage coolness, but you are just a Big Bang geek. Not a bad thing though, you may have a Penny waiting for you somewhere out there.

13. You Change Your Ringtone A Lot

You have Attention Deficit Disorder. Fickle, undependable & bored easily. At work, you’re that dude that always checks out early, & in life, you’re that dude that goes through a woman a day (or attempts, & fails miserably, to do so)

14. Justin Bieber

You’re a loser who does not belong on this planet. (fine, I made this one up completely on my own)

So! Let’s see what my current diagnosis is.

1. Main general ringtone: Coldplay feat. Rihanna’s “Princess in China”, which I personally rearranged heavily to fuse only the best parts together. A yet-to-be released-on-the-radio track that is a curious concoction of modern pop between 2 unlikely artists, which falls somewhere in the likes of no. 13 & 6…I’m a swaggering egoistic unique leader with big balls who drives a sports car or a funky truck.

Dang, so close.

2. Personal favourite contact ringtone: Santana+Mercedes with Glee’s version of “Someone Like You/Rumour Has It”. Um, a little bit of no. 4, 6 & 7? I’m a social butterfly that drives a funky truck running away from my own life. Har har.

3. SMS ringtone 1: StarCraft Terran Command going “Bleep! Nuclear launch detected…”. Nerd alert!

4. SMS ringtone 2: Coldplay’s “Life in Technicolor II (Prospekt’s March)”. I seem to own many funky trucks.

What’s yours? Stop cheating, & don’t you even dare change that Bieber ringtone of yours…(insert violent evil laugh here).

This is just bonkers.

The Girl in the Train

Today I saw a girl in the train,

A girl so flawless she would turn all straight women gay;

I know I would probably never see her again,

So I’m left with only a spellbinding memory of today.

Train rides are usually experienced in pain & with disdain,

But today’s just completely made my day;

So here I am writing this down with only 1 question in my brain,

Where were my balls when I needed them to seize the moment & have my way?

– an original crap written on a Tuesday morning, inspired completely by you, the one with the sparkly eyes, voluptous lips, plastic spectacles, shoulder-length hair, red dotted top & black Zara knee-length skirt –

Image posted strictly for visual purposes & has does not reflect any actual reality. It is the first image to pop up if you Google “the girl in the train”.

Every Boy Needs A Toy: Part III

Well it has taken a little longer than I would normally take, but it’s here now.

& the court has granted the 1st child custody to the other half.


Fruit massacre!

Read Part I & II.

An Ocean Apart

The good days – when in the midst of duty, beauty is able to be appreciated.

The worsening days – when you just wish you could go back home at the end of the day.

& with the end of the year looming, the worst has yet to arrive.

Right at this juncture, it just happens that both of us are in the middle of the seas, performing our respective duties to our nation (& our own well-being) in our own roles. Oddly enough, both of us are actually geographically closer to each other right now than we would be when we return to land to our respective regional offices.

“No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it. After all, you can’t have a light without a dark to stick it in.

Things I Learned Over The Weekend Getaway

I love driving. Especially driving for – or with – my better half, & a good road mix-tape.

I have an insanely awesome bunch of friends. The tipsy after-shots Kledang dim sum session was just one of those times you are glad you have such fantastic bros (& sis) to hang out with. Besides the fact that having dim sum when you are high is already awesome enough.

A drive down to Ipoh for me was always going to be about the brilliant food. & to journey down memory lane, recollecting some of the most nostalgic locations & experiences from university life spent there. What I was reminded of from the last weekend is – what are such experiences without company; without someone to share them with?

Whether it’s your better half or your friends, indeed happiness is only real when shared.

& yes, I think we all truly miss our lives as students. Working really kinda sucks whichever way you see it.

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